My Path to Single Motherhood

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about my path to single motherhood. It's so strange because it feels so natural and normal to me -- that I sometimes forget how unconventional my path has been.

Plan A

Every since I was a little girl, I had always wanted to have children. I had big dreams about having birth children and adopting. My "Plan A" approach was always in this order: fall in love, get married, have birth children, provide foster care, and adopt.

When I turned 28, I started seriously considering the "what if's" about Plan A not working out. I had just moved to a new state, was away from all my friends/family, and I was finding it difficult to meet any new quality men. I tried a bunch of stuff: online dating, volunteering, getting involved in the community, speed dating, singles events, etc. But it just wasn't happening for me.

Starting to think about Plan B

When I was 28, I wasn't ready to give up on Plan A. But I also didn't want to give up on living the life I wanted because of the lack of finding a partner. At that time I started looking into having my own birth child using donor sperm. I had given myself a "deadline" of sorts, that if I reached 33 and I still haven't met someone, that I would pursue having a birth child. I just wasn't really ready to do it at 28. I also didn't want to be too old and from my research at the time, 35 seemed like where the big fertility decline would start happening. So, 33 seemed like a good time to start.

Things with Plan A weren't working out and I wasn't ready for Plan B (I wrote about it a little bit here). At that time in my life I felt like it would've been selfish for me to move forward with having my own child. When I read through my old diaries, I think part of it was I wasn't really ready to become a single mom yet. I was scared of all the ways my life would change and I didn't know if I was ready for that at 28, without a husband. Not to mention, I still had big hopes of meeting someone and wasn't ready to let that go yet.

That's when I started looking into foster care.

Plan C: Foster Parenting 

I always knew that I wanted to be a foster parent and that I eventually wanted to adopt. I figured, why not now? Due to some big family drama, I ended up holding off until I was 30 to move forward with becoming a foster parent.

Why fostering and not adopt? I often get asked why I went into being a foster parent and not just doing straight adoption. As I mention under my Plan B, I just don't think I was ready to be a single mom yet. But I still wanted to help children, which has always been a dream of mine. I figured that I'll become a foster parent and if/when one of my foster children became eligible for adoption, I can pass that bridge when it came. That it was all in God's hands.

I just didn't want my Plan A to stop me from living my life or put me "on hold" from pursing things.

Living Plan C: Being a Foster Parent 

I have to admit that being a foster parent is probably a lot more difficult than just having your own kids! I didn't know that at the time. I had big ideals of helping children, helping reunify them with their parents, and that life would go on as it should. That's not really how it happened.

As a foster parent, you are under such scrutiny (which I understand -- but doesn't make it easier to live through it). You are limited on your parenting techniques, there's a huge time commitment - more so than having your own birth child (monthly visits, required appointments, transporting the child to meetings, court hearings, etc), and not to mention the incredible emotional attachment you have to your foster kids. Loving a child goes beyond sharing genetics. Not only that, you become an advocate, you become their voice, you fight for their best interests.

Plan A? Yeah --> Not happening at this point. There was no way I could meet someone when I had rotating foster children. Saying goodbye to my foster kids was not only hard for me, but was hard for all the other people that knew my kids. Not only that, my "extra time" was non-existent. My life quickly started revolving around my foster children and there really wasn't room for anything else.

Plan B? Yeah --> Not happening at this point. I was so invested in my foster kids and committed to helping more kids, that 33 came and I thought, "Maybe Plan B isn't for me and I can adopt?" 

Being a foster parent and saying goodbye to all my kiddies was probably the hardest thing I have ever had to live through... At this point in my journey I knew I wanted to move forward with adoption, but I was still committed to being a foster parent. As a foster parent, I was very dedicated to helping reunify children with birth family. A bit of conflicting feelings there --> temporary care vs. permanency / adoption. The most difficult part about saying goodbye to my foster children was that once they were gone -- there was a time where I had no children in my home. It was during those times that I really missed being a mom and missed having children around. It was such an empty void in my heart and in my home. That's when I absolutely knew that I was finally ready to become a single mother. I had started contemplated domestic infant adoption or going straight adoption through the foster care system.

Plan D: Adoption 

What's interesting is that I had started looking back into Plan B in November 2013. I was 33, almost 34 at the time, and I was between foster care placements. I started to get that "feeling" back of wanting to experience pregnancy, giving birth, and having my own birth child. Not to mention that I had some serious heartbreaks from saying goodbye to some of my foster kids... I was at a point where I felt completely 100% ready to be a single mom, either through adoption or through having my own birth child. I even scheduled an appointment with an RE for a consult. What stopped me was my insurance coverage! I didn't realize the hefty $$ of TTC. At 33 and 34 years old, they had the requirement of trying for 12 months without success before infertility coverage kicked in (medicated and monitored). So, I decided to wait until 35 (when I only needed 6 cycles to get coverage), save money, and take some time to really think about pursing Plan B again.

Well, the very next month (December 2013) I received my next foster child, Lucky #7 -- my Little Guy, my forever son -- he is my first and only foster child that became eligible for adoption while he was in my care. I talk about his adoption timeline here. There were rocky times during his placement that I wasn't sure if I would be able to adopt him or not. There were times where I felt completely broken and lost at the thought of him leaving me. I remember going straight to church after a court hearing and just crying in the pews and asking for strength and acceptance. I'm grateful every single day to call him my Forever Son and be his Mama. In a lot of ways, he's changed my life for the better and I can't imagine my life without him.

Back to Plan B 

As I mentioned, things were pretty rocky with my son's foster care placement. When my son was about to turn 1 years old and I was about to turn 35, I decided I would move forward with TTC and trying to build my family. I still managed to take two more foster children while I was moving forward with adopting my son and going through fertility treatments. That's really where this blog started and most of it's documented here so I won't totally recap it... the struggles of TTC, infertility, and almost 2 years of fertility treatments. Now, I'm almost 30 weeks pregnant and expecting my baby boy to arrive in a few more weeks.

Sometimes I look back and wonder how the heck I was able to go through fertility treatments, take in two of my hardest foster children, and go through my son's adoption -- all at the same time. What was I thinking? I'm just tired thinking about it now... LOL. Somehow though, I managed!

Thoughts on Plan A 

I would lie if I said that I don't mourn Plan A. Every now and then I get really sad about it and wish I had someone to share my joys about my son and about my new baby boy. I also wish at times that I had someone to tag-team with! Especially being pregnant, my energy levels are so low and the fatigue is killer.

But in reality, I have no regrets about my path. My path led me to my son and it led me to make this precious baby boy. If just one thing was different, I wouldn't have my boys and they are everything to me.

I also can't really imagine co-parenting. I mean, it's great in "theory" thinking about sharing the joys and tag-teaming and all... The grass is always greener, right? But I like the independence I have in parenting the way I want to, in making decisions, and I like that I'll never have to worry about custody arrangements or being separated from my kids.

I also don't know if I have the energy or time to try and "build" anything if I do meet someone! My energy goes towards my kids. Right now, I'm fine with that. I have given up on Plan A happening, since I believe that my life has happened just the way it was meant to and in the right order to get me to this exact point. But I'm not closed off to a possible Plan E in the future, if that's where life takes me. There sure are some hot / available single dads or single men out there,  right?! ;) LOL. I don't admit it much, but I am a romantic at heart.

Of course there are down-sides to being a single parent. Making every decision, while nice, is sometimes hard when you have no one else to bounce the ideas off of who is 100% invested in the decision as you are. Then there's the constant worry that something will happen to me and then the crazy concern of my kid's lives being changed so drastically... However, one can worry and worry about all the "What If's" that can happen in life. There are no guarantees of course. I just have to pray that God will take care of my boys no matter what. That's one reason I'm so diligent about keeping all my Estate Planning up-to-date and current, because that's the only thing I can do to make sure they're ok if something were to happen - the rest is in God's hands.

Being a Single Mom 

As I mentioned, my "Plan A" approach was always in this order: fall in love, get married, have birth children, provide foster care, and adopt.

My actual "Life" happened in this order: provide foster care, adopt, have birth children. Maybe there's a "fall in love" and "get married" in my future -- that's still to be seen and still to be written.

All and all, I don't have any regrets. I love my son more than I ever thought I could love anyone. I feel like I was meant to be his Mama. I've written this before, but I truly believe that God brought us together. In all of life's random moments and happenings, I feel like God chose me to be his Mama. Every night when we go to sleep, I tell my son "I am so happy and lucky to be your Mama." We pray every night and the first thing we do is thank God for making us a family. I mean it every single time I say it. No matter how bad the day was or what bad thing happened, I will always be grateful for this wonderful son of mine.

For my new baby boy, my heart can just burst with anticipation to meet him for the first time and see his little face. If I had chosen any other time to move forward with TTC or if I chose not to ever pursue Plan B or if any of my other 10 cycles had worked -- I wouldn't have this perfect little person growing inside me right now. He is my little miracle. It's a little strange to think I've been working up to this moment -- the moment of my baby boy's birth. From my first "thoughts" of becoming a single mother in 2008, to my first call to a fertility clinic in November 2013, to my first RE meeting in November 2014, to my positive pregnancy test in September 2016, to his soon-to-be birth in May or June of 2017. I can't wait to meet him and for him to meet his big brother and for my son to have a baby brother. For my little family of three to forge down this path of life together. It truly feels like a dream come true at times.

Life works in mysterious ways. It's always funny to step back and just look at your life's path and think that you are exactly where you need to be and all is how it should be.

So many Choses: Choosing a Baby Carrier

Oh my... You'd think since I've been a foster parent and I've been through the entire "baby carrier" dilemma multiple times already, that I would not have an issue choosing a baby carrier.

That would be  WRONG.

I know how overwhelming choosing baby items can be. Luckily, since I've had so much experience with babies I haven't had a big issue choosing what I want / need for my baby boy. The only exception is in baby carriers.

I'll give you a brief background of my baby wearing experience.

2011: Very novice at baby wearing. I used a sling for my first foster baby. It was extremely uncomfortable, but I had no clue what I was doing. I just got the first sling I saw at Target.

2013: My first foster son had high medical needs and was very clingy, loved being held. It was hard holding him because he had little control over his head / body -- making it hard to multi-task when home and tiring exclusively holding him when out. So, I tried the Bjorn. I was at Babies-R-Us just overwhelmed with choosing a carrier when I met someone wearing their baby -- she gave good recommendations on the Bjorn, so I got it.

I have to say -- I did love the Bjorn. But little did I know about hip dysplasia and stuff at the time... However, it worked for me. I never used the Bjorn with another baby again because of the inappropriate leg positioning though.

2013: I also received my son as my foster placement this year as a NB and he would soon become my guinea pig with all things baby carriers. I already knew from my previous foster son that I wanted to baby carry more. You can read about all the benefits of baby carrying, but I think the benefits are huge -- especially for foster babies entering the foster system. It helps with bonding, attachment, etc.

Moby Wrap: I LOVED the Moby Wrap. I used it until my son was about 6 months old. My son was a winter baby, so it worked perfect for us. I loved the hands-free aspect of things and it felt very secure. The only issues: 1) It was hard to put on. I would have to put it on prior to leaving the house, so I didn't have to wrap in the parking lot and get the wrap dirty (it's so long it would hit the floor). So I felt like I lived in it! 2) There is definitely a learning curve on how tight to wrap it. It does stretch and there were times where if I was wearing it for a long time, it felt like my son was sinking -- and I'd have to take him out and re-wrap tighter.

Ring Sling (Maya Wrap): I also LOVED The ring sling when my son was a NB. I used it during his first plane ride, since it was so easy to put on / off. Only issue with this is the RING. You can't wear it through the medal detectors (which I didn't realize at the time). So, I had to take him out to walk through the medal detectors, then put him back on -- which really sucked. After that, I never wore him in the ring sling at the airport again. The only reason I didn't use the ring sling more often was because it's not totally hands-free. You need to keep a hand on the baby.  It also hurt my shoulders if I used it for extended time because of the weight distribution. What I loved it for were quick trips into the store for a front carry or hip carry - but not for extended periods of time.

Onya Outback Carrier (soft structure carrier): I absolutely LOVE my Onya Outback. It's easy to use, has multiple uses (can be used as a high chair), and it's breathable in the hot weather. I used the Onya with my son all the way until he was 2 years old. The only issue I had with the Onya was that my son would get indents on his legs where his legs were against the carrier. My son was small, so maybe the "frog" position was too wide for him? I always had to make sure he was wearing pants when he rode in it. He never complained about it -- but it bothered me.

After this -- you'd think that I'd found the carriers I would love, right? Nope!

2015: I received my last foster son and he was all about being close to me -- all the time! So I wore him a lot. He hated the Moby Wrap. He hated the Onya Outback. He moved too much to use the Ring Sling while also having my son (not hands-free) and didn't feel secure. So, I tried a new carrier: The Tula (a soft structured carrier). The Tula is very similar to the Onya -- but for some reason, my foster son just loved the Tula over the Onya. So I exclusively used the Tula with my foster son and I loved it. No complaints on it at all.

I do have to admit that I have a bit of an obsession with baby carriers and it's so very hard to determine which carrier would work for which baby. Now, the dilemma I'm facing: Which baby carrier to use with my new baby boy??

Soft Structured Carrier (SSC)

I bought a new SSC.. I know, I know... I already have two that I love: the Onya and the Tula, why need another? I mentioned that the Onya Outback was breathable, but I also mentioned that the Onya left indent marks on my son's legs. The Tula is warmer (not breathable material). I need one that'll work for the hot weather. I ended up getting the Lillebaby Airflow carrier. I'm hoping I love it and that my baby loves it! What I like about it is: you can adjust the width of the carry at the legs -- making it narrower if needed. You can also use the Lillebaby from NB... although I love SSC, I don't prefer it for the NB stage, not as snuggly as a wrap, but it's nice to have that option.

Wrap

I already know that I prefer the Wrap-style for Newborns. However, the Moby Wrap I have is very very warm and my baby will be born in the summer. So I've been researching baby wraps like crazy....! There are too many choices and I can't settle on one: Moby Evolution (supposed to be more light weight), Wrapsody Hybrid Wrap, Oscha Ice Cotton Wrap, etc. The Moby is a better choice $ wise, but I'm not sure if that's the best overall wrap.

Not to mention -- what if baby boy doesn't like the wrap? LOL.

All this blog entry to say -- I still can't decide on a Wrap! Ugh. I'm leaning towards the Wrapsody Hybrid Wrap right now, but can't decide if spending the extra money is worth it or not. I found this blog that compares some wraps:

http://shopzerberts.blogspot.com/2011/04/stretch-wrap-comparison.html

I'm at a standstill and need to think about it a little more before I make a purchase.

It's funny the things you contemplate when you're pregnant! Baby carriers is one area I didn't think I would need to purchase again for -- but here I am with a new SSC and now going to get a new Wrap. I know the WHY behind it, but I just find it funny that I'm so indecisive about it!

Hopefully I'll be able to maintain my blog post-baby and can post updates on which carrier worked and which didn't.

29w+3d: MFM Diabetes Follow-up

I had my MFM diabetes follow-up today. It ended up being kind of a whirlwind of an appointment because I had to bring my son with me. He has strep throat -- AGAIN! Ugh. This is the first time I've brought him to any of my pregnancy appointments. I didn't really have a choice, since he can't go to daycare/preschool while sick. But with him being miserable, he was a little stinker during my visit!

Stats:

• Weight: +7 lbs 
• Blood Pressure: 118/75 
• Fetal Heart Tones: 154 bpm 

My blood pressure has gone down quite a bit! I think it's because my anxiety / worry levels have started to go down the closer I get to delivery. I think it's gotten much better since I've reached viability and every week I've made since. It also helps that I can feel baby boy pretty consistently and often. 

My glucose numbers weren't horrible, but they weren't great either. We are making some increases (which will probably keep happening until I deliver): 

• Morning: Humulin N increased to 30iu, Humulin R increased to 14iu 
• Evening (before meal): Humulin R increased to 14 iu. However, if my before-dinner glucose is over 120, I am to take 16 iu. 
• Evening (before bed): Humulin N increase to 52 iu. But, I don't have the syringes for this yet -- my syringes only go up to 50. A new prescription was sent to my pharmacy, so I'm waiting for them. Until I get them, I'm to take 50 iu. If my fasting blood sugars are horrible -- I'll need to up it to 52 iu and just use two separate needles (which I really don't want to do!). 

I don't really mind the increase in insulin dosages. I already have to give myself the injections, so the "amount" I inject doesn't matter. I'm just glad we're not adding more injections. Luckily my breakfast and lunch glucose levels are really good, so we don't have to add another insulin dosage before lunch -- which I'm hoping to not have to add ever! 

Overall, the appointment was quick and easy. The funny part of having my son there is that I had to pee in a cup. Who would've thought that having a 3 year old there would have that cause potential craziness -- as he wanted to play with the cup. Ugh. Gross. He also was playing with switches and turned the music to its highest volume in the doctor's office -- startling us. Not to mention him running around like mad and not following directions. 

Boys will be boys! And I'm about to have two of them. LOL. 

OH -- and not MFM appointment related... But, I think I officially experienced my first Braxton Hicks contractions today! I was laying down during my son's nap time and my stomach got really tight. It didn't hurt or anything. Then it went away and came back a few more times. Very strange feeling. I kind of wanted to freak out about it... but I knew they were going to come eventually. I'll just mention it at my OB appointment next week and see what they say. 

Next Steps: 4/11 Diabetes follow-up and Growth Ultrasound 

29w+0d: Elective 3D/4D Ultrasound, Take 1

I was so excited about my elective 3d/4d ultrasound, but it didn't go quite as planned! I had the ultrasound yesterday.

I invited a few close friends to come to the ultrasound, thought it would be fun to have them see the baby. Plus, it was going to be my son's first time "seeing" baby brother -- I haven't brought him to any of my ultrasounds since they last so long and there's no way he'd be able to sit through an entire appointment.

Baby boy was extremely active an hour before the elective u/s. His 10 kick counts were done within 6 minutes, which I counted right after breakfast. I was a little worried that he wouldn't be as active during the u/s and... he wasn't! I tried eating candy and drinking juice -- but it didn't work, he was comfy and didn't want to move.

We got to see a few things: his ear, his chubby cheek, his arm, his leg, his spine, his heart. But he wouldn't get into position to get a good picture of his face. He's still head down and likes to bury his face in my placenta. The ultrasound tech was a little rough with the ultrasound probe -- trying to get him to move, but no luck. She tried flashing a light on my tummy, playing music on my tummy, having me move around, etc. Nothing worked. We tried for an hour.

So, no cool pictures of the baby's face and no cool movements were seen. Which is so weird because at my doctor appointments we usually have the opposite issue -- where he moves too much and they can't get the measurements they want!

I get a free re-scan that I'm going to go to in 2 weeks. I was a little bummed that my friends didn't get to see his face or get to see him move! But they seemed to enjoy the experience at least!

I did get a heartbeat animal, which my son helped us pick out: 

We also got a few gifts for baby brother from a few of our friends :)

I wish things would've went better at the ultrasound, but not much can be done if baby boy was tired and or sleeping! Hoping to have better luck next time.

29 Weeks Pregnant!

How far along: 29 weeks. 9 weeks (63 days) to go for possible delivery at 38 weeks. Can't believe I'm only a week away from 30 weeks. For some reason THIRTY weeks feels like a big milestone. 

How big is baby: Acorn Squash. Ovia app: 

Weight Gain: +6 lbs. 

Stretch Marks: Getting a little more pronounced stretch marks now. My son even asked about them. 

Symptoms: Nothing new. Same old stuff: fatigue, aches/pains, tired, pregnancy brain, etc. 

Sleeping: Is it possible to get up even MORE at night time? Argh. It seems that 12am / 2am / 4am are my peeing hours. Hard to make it more than 2 hours without getting up. With having to get up so much, my sleep is suffering big time. Insomnia and just a hard time winding down and going to sleep in the first place. 

Food cravings: The never ending chocolate craze...!!! Argh. 

Food aversions: No. 

Maternity Clothes: Nothing new. 

Movement: Baby boy has had very strong movements this week, where it sometimes feels like it rocks my entire body! It also feels like he's everywhere all at the same time. I always wonder what he's doing in there. 

What I did / Got for Baby: This week went by so fast. No specific baby tasks progress. I think I've done all I could do until mid-April or so. 

What I miss: Eating without guilt! 

Workouts: :( 

What I'm looking forward to: Finishing all the baby prep stuff. 

Best moment of the week: I went grocery shopping with my son and he rode in one of those "car" carts. He looked at the spot next to him and asked me, "Where's baby brother?" Like baby brother normally sits there or something. LOL. I told him, "Baby brother's in Mama's tummy." Then we got back to, "Ma ate baby brother? Ma, why did you eat my baby brother?" Got to love how 3 year olds think. 

Rants/Raves: Just a general rant. Going into the office this week was so exhausting!! Almost felt like I was hit by a train. Getting up at 4am when I'm having insomnia and not sleeping that well in general, then the one hour commute, then having after work appointments for my son or me -- I'm just so tired. I'm so tired of being tired! 

Appointments Next Week: 3/28 MFM diabetes follow-up and I have my birthing class next Saturday 4/1! 

28w+6d: Monthly OB Appointment

Had my monthly OB visit today. Stats:

• Weight: +6 lbs 
• Blood Pressure: 124/82
• Fetal Heart Tones: 148 bpm 

I received my "Third Trimester Instructions" document that includes: 

• Warnings: information on pre-term labor, pre-eclampsia, fetal movement, and doing labs. 
• Things to get done: 
• Sign up for childbirth classes -- DONE
• Sign up for breastfeeding class -- DONE
• Infant CPR -- already have my CPR license 
• Install baby's carseat -- going to wait until May to do this. 
• Research cord blood banking -- already decided against this. 
• Choose a pediatrician -- already done, going to use my son's pediatrician 
• FMLA -- need to bring paperwork to the OB. Not sure when to do this? My HR department told me I don't need to file paperwork with them until I'm a few weeks before my due date. Wonder if I can get the paperwork ahead of time or something? 
• Labor Instructions: yikes. 
• Vitamin K in Newborns: never heard of this, so interesting to read about it. 
• DTAP Vaccine: need to get this done. 

Nothing crazy special went on during the OB visit. Which is nice, as things have been pretty uneventful in my pregnancy for the last few weeks (fingers crossed it stays that way). I did get the "all clear" to get a prenatal massage -- so I'm excited about that! I just need to find the TIME to go. My schedule is just looking so cluttered right now. I've been getting some twitches in my legs and some charlie horses, that I spoke to the OB about. 

They also took some blood from me to test for stuff. I forget what she said they were testing for. They took 3 vials of blood... and it's been so long since I've had blood taken, that it was almost a "panic" thing for me! Ugh. I wish it wasn't like that, but needles have just been bothering me lately with my insulin injections. I normally don't have an issue watching the insulin needle go in -- but lately, I've just been closing my eyes and injecting it. Otherwise, I flinch if I watch. Talk about needle-phobia. Ugh. 

This was my last monthly visit, as now I'm moving to every 2 weeks. Then, at 32 weeks I'm going to have to go every week - TWICE a week. I asked if I can do the appointments at one time, OB said nope. I'll have an ultrasound and NST (non-stress test) done. I can choose to go to the MFM or the OB for these... I would like to do them at my MFM, but her office is further away, so I might opt to go to the OB to make it easier for me and save time. I'm a little concerned about juggling all the appointments: 

• Every 2 weeks for the OB - general visit 
• Every 2 weeks for the MFM - diabetes discussion 
• Every 4 weeks for the MFM - growth ultrasound (45-60 minutes) 
• Then at 32 weeks - 2 visits for an ultrasound (20-30 minutes) and for a NST (20-30 minutes) 

Not to mention just regular work stuff... regular life stuff... other appointments for my son... just so many appointments -- and just so very tired... 

But the nice thing is, I'm getting the care I need to ensure I have a healthy pregnancy and my baby boy is healthy. Got to focus on the positive! 

Next OB Appointment: 4/5 (I'll be 30 weeks) 

28 Weeks Pregnant

Sometimes I'm surprised when I can write one of these weekly blog entries saying that I've made it ONE MORE WEEK! The pregnancy still feels so surreal to me. Like I know in my mind it's happening, but at times it still doesn't feel like it's happening. 

I came across this and thought it was interesting: 

Now, here's your body pre-pregnancy. Crazy how bunched up your organs get. Amazing what the female body can do. 

How far along: 28 Weeks. 10 more weeks (70 days) until possible induction at 38 weeks. 

How big is baby: Eggplant. Ovia app: 

Weight Gain: +7 lbs 

Stretch Marks: Nothing new. 

Symptoms: Nothing terribly new. Still aches and pains. Sometimes feels like my tummy is very heavy. I have been getting some weird twitches in my legs. 

Sleeping: Nothing new. Still insomnia. Still getting up 1-2x's a night. Still getting weird pains if I move too fast. 

Food cravings: The never ending ice cream and chocolate cravings... 

Food aversions:  Nope. 

Maternity Clothes: Last week I mentioned I bought these underwear that also work as a belly support. I used them this week and I LOVE them, absolutely LOVE them!!! They're thin, so not too hot -- and they provide the right kind of support I prefer under a skirt/dress. I'm thinking of buying a few more... but am trying to curb my spending on clothes right now! I mentioned I bought some clothes that can be used post-pregnancy and for nursing purposes. I also bought some Maxi dresses to help me get through the hot weather. Can I just say... Maxi dresses are like the BEST clothing item EVER while pregnant. They're loose, cute, comfortable, and keep you cool. I would buy a million maxi dresses if I could. 

I saw some nursing bras/tank tops on sale, so I got two nursing bras and one tank top. I really like the bras - they are strangely comfortable! Didn't realize my current bras were "not" comfortable until I tried on the nursing bras. These ones are really nice because they "expand" with you. They're not top-of-the-line, but I like that I have some ready. 

Movement: Feeling baby boy move pretty consistently. Some pretty strong kicks every now and then. Some days he's more active than others. The days he's not so active, I do worry... I try not to! But it's hard. 

What I did / Got for Baby:  

• Laundry. I finally received some baby detergent and decided I was tired of seeing all the baby clothes "to be washed" sitting in the crib. I did 3 full loads of laundry: NB clothes, 0-3 month clothes, receiving blankets, blankets, burp cloths, bibs, boppy covers, etc. Now, I didn't factor in the "folding" of the clothes when I started the laundry! It took me 3 days to fold and sort everything into categories.  
• Storage Bins. I bought storage bins to store the baby's stuff in to keep on the changing table in my bedroom. I'll eventually post a picture of the baby's "corner" in my room when it's all done. 
• Sorted Clothes. I started sorting through my son's clothes and ended up putting them in containers. They were previously in vacuum sealed bags -- but I found that to not be so convenient. I prefer the clear containers for the clothes - easy to visually see and stack. I'm also went through my clothes and put clothes that: 1) I can't fit while pregnant, 2) won't work for nursing, and 3) are not summer clothes -- into vacuum sealed bags. 
• Kitchen. I mentioned I'm nesting a bit... well, I've been working on the kitchen. Sorting, organizing, purchasing, re-organizing. Not specifically "for" baby -- but has to do with being organized for when baby does come! The kitchen is pretty much all done and organized. I still need to clean out the freezer though, things just get buried in there. 

What I miss: Being able to sit comfortably. 

Workouts: cleaning and nesting count, right? 

What I'm looking forward to: my 3D/4D ultrasound. 

Best moment of the week: Seeing baby boy on the ultrasound and watching him move his little lips. 

Rants/Raves: Rave - I received two boxes from Amazon this week. Amazon isn't really good about putting "who" things are from and I had to go online to find out who bought items off my registry! A friend was so nice to buy baby boy a swing and bouncer. Thanks Steph!

I always like to put things together once I get them (in case something is missing or broken), so I put them together and went ahead and started setting up the baby's "corner" downstairs. The bouncer is temporarily sitting in the pack-n-play for space-saving. I rearranged the living room to make room for the baby corner. My son's toys are in the opposite corner. 

Can I just admit a very embarrassing thing? It took me longer than expected to put the swing together. Combined with being tired -- and the screws just not going in as easily as I would have preferred -- it took me FOREVER! I cried... ugh. But I must've put it together correctly because my son, who is OVER the weight limit for the swing, decided he wanted to sit in the swing when I wasn't looking. It didn't fall apart, so I'm guessing that's a win for proper assembly! :)

Another random "Rave" is that I'm loving the nesting thing. I've been so fatigued throughout the entire pregnancy and just so unmotivated. Now, I'm "motivated" -- but get so freaking tired after I excerpt myself -- but I'm getting a lot done. Like, I think this is the first time in a VERY long time that the laundry for the week was folded and put away daily vs. a marathon folding weekend. Not to mention the kitchen looks great! Yay for that. As I mentioned, spurts of motivated energy are nice. But I totally need a nap afterward.

Appointments Next Week: 3/24 last monthly OB appointment before moving to every 2 weeks. 3/25 my 3D/4D elective ultrasound.