I wasn't sure how I would "feel" going into the IUI today. I was worried for a little bit that I would be so disheartened and bitter that I wouldn't feel the excitement about the "potential for life" that could happen today. Glad to say that that isn't the case! I have this strange calm about the whole process... however, I'm also super excited! Like this giddiness of anticipation.
It's interesting how this TTC things works. The TWW from IUI Cycle #1 felt like FOREVER. Even just waiting to get to CD #1 felt like FOREVER. This time, Cycle #2, things seemed to be moving quicker. All of a sudden: It's Insemination Day!
Prepping for My IUI
IUI day is a little funny and interesting. I contemplate things like "what should I wear?" I know it doesn't matter in the long scheme of things, but I still think about it. It almost feels like I'm going on a date or something:
Does all this help with insemination? Of course not! But it makes me feel better going through the process if I feel my best :) Plus, this *could* possible be the day that leads to the big biggie -- having Baby C. So, why not? Doesn't take much more effort than normal. PLUS, it helps me focus on things I can control and not on the things I can't control --- like the sperm meeting the egg...!
I've also contemplated saying something funny to the RE. Some of my friends recommend, "Was it as good for you as it was for me?" or "That was fast." Silly things. I'm too shy to make any comments like that though! I was thinking it might lighten the moment, but I think I'll be too nervous to think of anything funny right after. It would be nice if my RE said something reassuring. But he's in and out and done so quick. No time for cuteness, I suppose. Plus, there are usually female nurses in the room -- wouldn't that be awkward to say something so silly to the Doctor with them there! LOL.
IUI Time!
I overestimated my driving time! Thought I'd run into more traffic than I did. I got there an hour early!!! I ended up driving around for a little while then going in 30 minutes early. They set me up in the lobby to watch some TV, gave me the remote to control the channel and all. Then, they said they were going to take me in early.
I go back into the teeny tiny room and am told to "get ready" again (remove clothes from waist down). I didn't do the insemisocks this time around. They are so quick at my clinic that last time I was in such a rush to put them on! So, decided to skip it this time. I did put my rosary on for good luck though :)
I then signed the sperm analysis report. 43,200,000 Motile Sperm!!! With 64% Motility!! GREAT NUMBERS!! I was very happy to hear that. I was able to get a copy and keep the vial the sperm came in as well.
I didn't realize I was so nervous... But when I put my feet in the stirrups -- my leg was shaking so bad, the entire table was moving!!! OMG, that was a bit embarrassing. I said, "Oh sorry, I'm nervous." I took a few deep breaths and he inserted the speculum... It didn't hurt last time - it hurt this time! Probably because I was so nervous. He then inserted the catheter and I felt a tiny tickle as it went through my cervix, then in went Monroe's Swimmers, all 43.2 million!!!! SWIM - SWIM - SWIM!!! Here's a picture of the catheter with the sperm in it already!!!
My clinic asks us to lay down for 10 minutes. I took 15 minutes, figured 5 minutes extra might help. I tried a new visualization process where I visualized the sperm swimming and meeting my egg and inseminating it. Then "Don't Stop Believing" came on the radio (they play music at my RE's office). I sang along and thought it was a good appropriate song for the occasion :) I prayed and prayed to God. Then I was out of there.
No tears this time!!! It really was "different" this time in a way, probably because I knew what to expect from the entire process.
How do I feel?
I feel good about this cycle! I'm hoping magic is happening in my Uterus right now and that this is all going to work out. I know the odds aren't in my favor, but I feel good anyways! My Baby C will come when the timing is right and that *may* be this time!!! I am currently optimistic!
Physically, I am feeling a little "full" right now and I am cramping a little bit, but it's not too bad.
Next Steps:
It's interesting how this TTC things works. The TWW from IUI Cycle #1 felt like FOREVER. Even just waiting to get to CD #1 felt like FOREVER. This time, Cycle #2, things seemed to be moving quicker. All of a sudden: It's Insemination Day!
Prepping for My IUI
IUI day is a little funny and interesting. I contemplate things like "what should I wear?" I know it doesn't matter in the long scheme of things, but I still think about it. It almost feels like I'm going on a date or something:
- Make sure all grooming is done - people with lights are going to be down there! No, really - there will be lights shining on my "who-ha" so they can see my cervix. I think that might be one of the worse parts of the entire IUI process.
- Make sure my hair is cute! Haha. I know this one is really arbitrary, but if I'm already "grooming" - doing my hair next just makes sense naturally.
- Wear cute undergarments, who knows who's going to see them?! There are nurses and doctors and staff all around that teeny tiny room!
- Wear light make-up. No rhyme or reason, just that I'm "going out" so putting on my face first makes sense. Plus, I take pictures while I'm there to track the journey, want to look decent.
- Wear cute, but easily removable clothes - I usually go with a skirt outfit. Today I'm wearing a maxi skirt.
Does all this help with insemination? Of course not! But it makes me feel better going through the process if I feel my best :) Plus, this *could* possible be the day that leads to the big biggie -- having Baby C. So, why not? Doesn't take much more effort than normal. PLUS, it helps me focus on things I can control and not on the things I can't control --- like the sperm meeting the egg...!I've also contemplated saying something funny to the RE. Some of my friends recommend, "Was it as good for you as it was for me?" or "That was fast." Silly things. I'm too shy to make any comments like that though! I was thinking it might lighten the moment, but I think I'll be too nervous to think of anything funny right after. It would be nice if my RE said something reassuring. But he's in and out and done so quick. No time for cuteness, I suppose. Plus, there are usually female nurses in the room -- wouldn't that be awkward to say something so silly to the Doctor with them there! LOL.
IUI Time!
I overestimated my driving time! Thought I'd run into more traffic than I did. I got there an hour early!!! I ended up driving around for a little while then going in 30 minutes early. They set me up in the lobby to watch some TV, gave me the remote to control the channel and all. Then, they said they were going to take me in early.
I go back into the teeny tiny room and am told to "get ready" again (remove clothes from waist down). I didn't do the insemisocks this time around. They are so quick at my clinic that last time I was in such a rush to put them on! So, decided to skip it this time. I did put my rosary on for good luck though :)
I then signed the sperm analysis report. 43,200,000 Motile Sperm!!! With 64% Motility!! GREAT NUMBERS!! I was very happy to hear that. I was able to get a copy and keep the vial the sperm came in as well.
I didn't realize I was so nervous... But when I put my feet in the stirrups -- my leg was shaking so bad, the entire table was moving!!! OMG, that was a bit embarrassing. I said, "Oh sorry, I'm nervous." I took a few deep breaths and he inserted the speculum... It didn't hurt last time - it hurt this time! Probably because I was so nervous. He then inserted the catheter and I felt a tiny tickle as it went through my cervix, then in went Monroe's Swimmers, all 43.2 million!!!! SWIM - SWIM - SWIM!!! Here's a picture of the catheter with the sperm in it already!!!
My clinic asks us to lay down for 10 minutes. I took 15 minutes, figured 5 minutes extra might help. I tried a new visualization process where I visualized the sperm swimming and meeting my egg and inseminating it. Then "Don't Stop Believing" came on the radio (they play music at my RE's office). I sang along and thought it was a good appropriate song for the occasion :) I prayed and prayed to God. Then I was out of there.
No tears this time!!! It really was "different" this time in a way, probably because I knew what to expect from the entire process.
How do I feel?
I feel good about this cycle! I'm hoping magic is happening in my Uterus right now and that this is all going to work out. I know the odds aren't in my favor, but I feel good anyways! My Baby C will come when the timing is right and that *may* be this time!!! I am currently optimistic!
Physically, I am feeling a little "full" right now and I am cramping a little bit, but it's not too bad.
Next Steps:
- The dreaded TWO WEEK WAIT!!!! I've decided that I'm going to "test out" my trigger this time. I bought a bunch of cheap tests from Wondfo off of Amazon. Since the trigger shot seemed to stay in my system for a long time (11-12 days), I want to make sure I don't get excited when I inevitably decide to test early. Because let's face it -- I had absolutely NO self control last time!! I'm not going to pretend I'll be able to hold off until my Beta test.
- I begin the Progesterone Vaginal Suppositories tomorrow. Oh joy :(
- Beta Test is scheduled for Tuesday 5/26 @ 7:45 am. The clinic is closed on Memorial Day (5/25) - so I have to wait an extra day. The torture...!
Dear Baby C, Hoping and praying for you! <3
"The longer you wait for something, the more you'll appreciate it when you get it. Because anything worth having is definitely worth waiting for." ~Anonymous
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