About two weeks ago, Birth Father stopped making visits and said he "gave up" on trying to get Little Guy back. Then, the very next week - Birth Father (BF) decided he would start visits up (after missing/canceling 2 visits). So, I had no clue what to expect at the trial.
FCRB Findings
I checked my mail the morning of the trial and I had received a copy of the Foster Care Review Board #3 report. To my surprise, it looks like BF arrived late and made a report to the FCRB. Here's what it said:
- He believes that Little Guy is well cared for by the foster mother.
- He is aware that the foster mother is better able to care for and provide for Little Guy than he would be able to.
- He believes that it is in Little Guy's best interest to be adopted by the foster mother.
- He does not want to remove Little Guy from the only home he has ever known.
When I read that I was surprised and hopeful. It sounded like BF was going to do what was in the best interest of Little Guy and putting him first... which is wonderful. It also looked like he might not fight the TPR.
Driving to the Court House
When I was driving to the court house, I received a call from the Parent Aide (PA). She told me that she couldn't tell me what the BF told her - but that I should be pleased with the trial. This also made me start thinking that BF would not fight TPR...
I started crying after I hung up the phone with the PA. Just the thought that this "wait" could be over soon was overwhelming. Could it possibly be?
The Trial
It was a weird day at the court house. The GAL (Guardian ad Litem) told me that there was a possibility that the trial would take too long (we only had scheduled a half day) and that if it didn't get settled today, that they would need to schedule a second day - which wouldn't be until October!! I was so nervous about that... that would mean TPR wouldn't happen for a few more MONTHS!
Then, the BF's lawyer wanted to talk to BF, so they delayed the hearing. Then they called the Assistant Attorney General (AAG) out and the GAL out to "talk". Then they called me out to "talk". BF said he wouldn't fight TPR. He just wanted to maintain contact somehow. I agreed to email and a PO Box.
Then Birth Mother's (BM) lawyer spoke to BM. BM said if BF wasn't fighting the TPR, that she wouldn't either. I agreed to the same: email and PO Box. She wanted me to guarantee "in person" meetings... I couldn't agree to that (for various reasons). Also, none of this was put in an official "post adoption agreement". It was just all oral. A post-adopt agreement would be discussed when I have an adoption lawyer and start completing paperwork and such.
Finally the trial started. Since the birth parent's weren't contesting the severance, they "denied and submitted" to the charges. The judge confirmed with them that they weren't coerced and were of right frame of mind, etc in making their decision. Then, the AAG interviewed the Case Manager. Then, BM's lawyer cross-examined the CM. BF's lawyer did not.
The Judge didn't "rule" that day because she wanted to review the exhibits to the case. It is expected that the ruling should happen within a week. What does that mean?
I get to move forward with adopting Little Guy!!!!!!
When BF was leaving, I didn't really know what to say to him... I just told him I knew this was hard on him and said "thank you"... so lame! I couldn't find the right words! I hurt for Little Guy's birth parents... I know they love him. I am grateful that they finally did what was right Little Guy.
When I was leaving the court house, I cried so hard. I just couldn't believe it... this was really going to happen. I will get to adopt Little Guy. Not *if* but WILL. I WILL BE ADOPTING LITTLE GUY!!! I can't believe he's going to be legally my son. He feels like he's mine already, but to be legally mine... and not fear that he will be taken from me. I can't even express in words how that feels. I feel so blessed... so grateful... How can I get so lucky to be chosen to be Little Guy's mommy? Such an overwhelming feeling of gratitude.
What Happens Next
- The judge needs to officially submit her ruling.
- Once this happens, my agency can complete my certification of adoption (takes about 30 days)
- I will also move into adoptions at DCS and get a new case manager.
- Then, after I'm certified - I can get an adoption lawyer.
- Then, I can request an expedited adoption date - within 60 days.
- Complete lots and lots of paperwork.
- Adopt Little Guy!
I'm hoping to adopt at the end of August or the beginning of September.
I'm still in shock and still can't believe it... I've had Little Guy since he was 4 days old and the thought that I get to see him grow up fills me with so much happiness, it brings me to tears every time I look at him.
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